The Coming of the Muse

"Generally, the germ of a future composition comes suddenly and unexpectedly...It would be vain to try to put into words that immeasurable sense of bliss which comes over me directly a new idea awakens in me and begins to assume a definite form. I forget everything and behave like a madman. Everything within me starts pulsing and quivering; hardly have I begun to sketch 'ere one thought follows another" Tchaikovsky, "Letter to Frau Von Meck"

In the dark of night with a single candle aglow, as I often do, there comes an ascention upon my shoulder as though a gentle hand has been there laid to give assurance of self and inspiration from an unseen source. Letters begin to string together formulating words upon the blank screen before me. Like the rushing streams of Spring the words flow through me coming hence from the same said unseen source.

As though my inner light has been set afire with new found dreams, aspirations and joys, incomprehensible to the human understanding, my fingertips play gleefully over the keys in rejoicing solidarity with the gentle hand upon my shoulder.
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The entrance of the Muse, angel, or whatever spiritual name one chooses to give to the hand upon the shoulder is a welcome event in the life of the writer. There is nothing worse than sitting in front of a blank screen wondering what to say next. Sometimes the writer will wrack their brains for hours and hours in front of the screen in vain. Nothing. Nothing comes to mind to fill the empty space or start

the next great novel to be consumed by the masses. The confidence in the creativity of the writer wanes in the presence of the blank page. Self-doubt consumes the writer and worries take root in the back of the mind whether or not the deadline will be met? will the story ever be told? will it be interesting and worth the effort? Here lies the scene in countless movies of the author ripping blank pages out of the old typewriter, crumpling them into a ball and casting them aside. And yet, somehow within a short period of time they are back at the keyboard ready to try again.

Tchaikovsky described the Muse as an immeasurable bliss that overcame him. It is in vain to describe this bliss that comes over all of us when we have our ephiphany or 'ah-ha!' moment. It's as though the heavens open and great Hallelujiahs are sung in rejoicing; the dams blocking the river of creation have been opened and it becomes an unstoppable force. The words flow by the thousands weaving a new story, a poem, or a song in the world giving the appearance of madman hammering away at the keys oblivious to all that is transpiring around him. There is nothing but the writer, the keyboard and the composition; it is bliss - pure and holy.

Writers, however, do not have the corner on the Muse market. Each person, in their own vocation and life, is visited in the moments when all seems hopeless or there is no resolution to a problem plaguing them.

Has your Muse come to visit lately?

Redemption



"Stone walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage. Minds innocent and quiet take that for a hermitage: If I have freedom in my love, and in my Soul am free, Angels alone, that soar above, enjoy such liberty." ~ Richard Lovelace, "To Althea from Prison"

The dark shadows encompassing the world, encroaching on the very doorstep, bring me to the brink of suffocation. All the world lies in slumber under the full moon made to shine with a beryl hue by the fires that burn a thousand miles away. It rises above the horizon as though the guard at the prison gates which lie twenty miles in any direction at the edge of the grayness of urban sprawl. 

Deeply entrenched at the center of destruction, I sit at the window wondering how to reach the guard to plead for freedom; redemption. The centuries stand in line along the hardened asphalt paths. Their limbs, adorned with flesh of various shades of green, reach Heavenward in adoration against the blackened sky in solidarity with the guardian - keeping me breathless.

This cage of my own making, built with my own two hands, in the name of progress is ever expanding, yet holds me hostage in a few square feet of bitterness. A deep and insiduious bitterness that, like a flesh eating disease, slowly eats away at the inner-lining of my encasement.  

The days of being cradled in the warmth of the sinewy blanket on a sun soaked hillside are but a distant memory that haunts my every waking moment. The clouds cover the sun in a dark and menacing shadow rift with violence and power. The day has become as the night protected by the guardian that arises at the breaking of dawn. Dawn, what is this visage that floats from the recesses of my mind? A breaking of glorious rays of light slicing through the darkness casting shadows into the crevices of the world. It is but a memory; a ghost of things that once were.

As the days and nights pass I travel to the edges, to the gates, where a glimpse of all that I had, all that I was, all that could have been exists. There is no escape. Every attempt entangles me in the miles and miles of wires, concrete, steel, and brick dragging me back to the center, to my few feet of bitterness - leaving me breathless.

While the world cries out: "What hath God wrought?" I...I lay in humbled acceptance of the truth. It is I who have wrought this prison of starvation, lonliness and want. It is I, and for it I am eternally damned to sit at the center of destruction and lament the days of old when the world flourished without my interference.

My only hope is for redemption. ~ Adam

Imagine if You Will

Outrageous! Deplorable! Scandelous! Shame on you; shame on me! I read with great interest the article in the Wall Street Journal regarding young adult books and the content therein.

It seems the author, and a few of the author's sources, are unhappy with the content of the young adult books of today. Their opinion, of which they are duly noted as entitled to, is one of which believes the content of young adult books today are: too graphic, violent, degenerative in nature, smattered with vulgar language, and contain what could be conceived as nothing more than soft-core porn smut.

This conversation is a double-edged sword for any YA author; truly - you are damned if you do and damned if you don't. On one hand if you fill your novel with the aforementioned offending content you are perceived as contributing to the degradation of the world youth; on the other hand if you don't include even a smidgon of the aforementioned offending content you will be selling your wares to primarly family and friends - mostly out of obligatory support of your chosen career path. So what is a YA author to do?

Today's youth - worldwide - are subjected on a daily basis to the aforementioned offending content through video games, television (primetime and daytime), reality TV, movies, youtube videos, and the list goes on and on. A simple truth of the matter is this: with all these venues readily available to our young people, they are slowly losing some of their ability to imagine on their own.

Let's go back to first grade, or even Kindergarten when the average child is first beginning to learn to read. Or, even further back to storytime as infants and toddlers. Pictures are readily available on each page of the storybook to allow the child to identify the world around them in relation to the words on the page. Association.

As the child advances in their ability to understand the world around them - what a rabbit looks like, what color the grass or sky is etc., the child begins to read with fairly good comprehension skills and moves into the chapter books - you know the ones with pictures only on the first page of, or between chapters. The child is able to imagine the world painted in words and becomes personally involved in the story as the child understands it.

At a certain age, it varies with each individual child, the book becomes less and less desireable in favor of the rich color and cinematography of television and movies. In our world of a 24/7 lifestyle, the book becomes less and less desireable in favor of the 'moment of peace' television or movies for the parent or caregiver as well. And here begins the child's first experiences with losing their ability to imagine the world painted in words. He or she cannot fathom the exact shade of the blade of grass without it being defined in a plethora of adjectives culminating in the definition of the shade of sage. This becomes the necessitating factor requiring full movie action book trailers to allow the child to get the general gist of the story beforehand.

By the time the young person reaches the age of twelve, give or take a year or two, they have not only been influenced by the Disney Kids who have gone on to bigger and greater things - like what appears to be pole dancing during concerts that are broadcast worldwide via the internet - they have witnessed many things they will never admit to in front of their grandmother. They have used language they dare not repeat in the sacred and holy houses of worship by threat of eternal damnation. They have visited websites in the solitary seclusion of their bedrooms in hopes Mom or Dad won't come knocking on the door whilst enjoying their secret pleasures. They have commited vile acts of cruelty and violence narily escaping discovery and protected by the tween and teenage code of silence. Despite all of this, our youth are in grave danger of being corrupted by YA authors who have to create detailed imagery in an effort to ensure the young person understands exactly what is happening; for better or worse.

It is my humble opinion, and feel free to correct me if I am wrong, that YA authors do not set out with the intent of having to describe every minute detail of a story -graphic or otherwise - to sell a few books. Many would love the opportunity to let the young person imagine the scene in their own comprehension. But, alas, the author must compete with the visual based world of animated videography. A world that leaves nothing to the imagination. A world where graphic detail is presented by default; the pure nature of seeing a story in two dimentions and sometimes three. A world that can be interactive through gaming software or passive through television, videos, movies, etc.

There are scenes in Sticks and Bones that I wish I could have done differently, but I know in my heart of hearts, it had to be in detail or the story would be lost on the younger reader. The impact of the message in the story would be lost. I knew I had to compete with all the visuals in the world and that meant making it as real as possible to the young reader through the use of their language, their activities, and defining their world as they see it.

I can't speak for other authors. In fact, I won't speak for other authors. But, I know this: Our children are more mature at earlier ages than we were due to the age of information. They know and understand things we never conceived of knowing at the ages they do today. I know that young people will choose movies or videos over books in most circumstances. I know that what I write is no more degregrading than what they already know to be real in the world. Some call it progression in the world; others call it outrageous, deplorable and scandelous. We will never come to a happy medium because we all base our opinions on our core values, cultures, traditions and the beliefs we hold near and dear to our hearts. We can, however, acknowledge our differences of opinion and agree to disagree.

Sticks and Bones Synopsis

Available on Amazon for 99 Cents

I am very excited today! The new cover for "Sticks and Bones" has been completed!

I have to say I was skeptical of the whole Amazon Kindle publishing process at first, but after two months of using it I now wish I had done this from the beginning. I have now joined the thousands of Indie publishers and I have no regrets.

"Sticks and Bones" is my first published novel. A murder mystery that is directed towards the 16+ audience that takes the reader on a journey through the modern American high school.

Set in the small(ish) town of West Fargo, North Dakota, Detective Marcia Grant finds herself in the midst of an investigation no detective, male or female, wants to be involved; the murder of a high school student with no apparent motive.

Detective Grant finds out that high school isn't for the meek or timid. You have to be pretty enough, thin enough, strong enough, straight enough, and brave enough just to make it through the day unscathed. But is this daily struggle enough to constitute murder?

Small towns have a unique attribute in that everyone knows everyone and everything about everyone; mostly. Clyde Jourdaine knows this more than any other resident of the community. He's a hateful old man whose abusive demeanor has caused his children to abandon him after the death of their mother leaving him with with a farmstead to maintain on his own. Falling victim to his alcoholism, Clyde moves into town abandoning the farmstead which becomes the party place of choice for the A-List students. And also the scene of a brutal murder with no real suspect; except Clyde.

The holiday season becomes one of suspicious eyes and whispered accusations with no arrests in sight. Detective Grant and her team of investigators, whom are no more than your average beat cop, work around the clock tracking down dead-end leads. The investigation, even with the assistance of the Fargo Police Department CSI team, is botched from the beginning with key pieces of evidence overlooked due to inexperience with homocide cases. West Fargo hadn't had a murder case in fifty years and Fargo's last murder had been fifteen years ago.

While back tracking over the crime scene, Officer Jonathon Drake engages in an explosive, violent episode with Detective Grant and disappears without a trace; casting suspicion on himself. Without Jonathon, Marcia is left with rookie officer, Bruce Jefferson, and a veteran officer, Arnie Paulson who's biding his time to retirement.

"Sticks and Bones" allows the reader to identify with each character as friends, neighbors, leaders and followers we all love to hate. But which character will act on their love hate relationships is a mystery that unfolds and promises an ending the reader will never forget.

Sticks and Bones is currently available on Amazon for Kindle and Kindle Apps. The print version will be available the week of June 16th for $8.99. Get your Kindle version today for 99 cents before the price goes back to the original published price of $2.99.  It will be made available for Nook and other e-readers on Smashwords after the print version is released.